RSSSnyder’s Watchmen Unlikely and Inhumane
Mar 07
Movies Comic Book Adaptation, Films, Movies Comments Off
Maybe the big joke about Watchmen is how completely devoid of humanity the film itself is. Leaving the theater, it might be something worth pondering, or if you’re like me, you might inclined just to forget the whole thing ever happened.
I am a huge fan of well-told comic book adaptations, and I will credit director Zac Snyder and writers David Hayter and Alex Tse for having a thorough and unrelenting vision when it comes to Watchmen. The problem is, it is so saturated with intent, there is nothing really fun about it. The film is improbable in a way that defies the historical context within which it rests. The Watchmen are a group of retired, strung out superheroes shutdown by Nixon (apparently in his fifth term in office) who come out of hiding when it appears that someone is trying to kill them off one by one.
Except the truth is murkier than that. And by the time it comes to light that there is, in fact, no serial superhero killer, you don’t really care. By then you have sat through origin stories of all the principal characters and watched an almost three-hour morality play unfold that makes Gibson’s Passion a bit tepid after all. But that’s the joke really, Watchmen is brutally unpleasant to watch. The historical backdrop and cameo appearances by legendary figures (Lee Iacocca takes bullet in the film) serve as distractions and not in a good way. The main characters are street fighters, picking fights with the scourge of the earth and suffering almost without injury through battle after battle (though fortunately they can beat up on each other and do some damage). The film’s questionable moral center is less food for thought and more just a reason to turn away.
I was most distracted by the use of both film and superhero cliches. The ejaculation of fire when two characters climax during sex seems more like a fanboy’s fantasy of superheroes having sex than the real thing. And how come the heroes never seem to get hurt? None of them, except the atomic man Dr. Manhattan (played by Billy Crudup, whose blue penis needs its own film, honestly, more penis or less, please) seemingly have actual super powers. Yet they punch, kick, body slam and fire bomb their way through scores of villains and rarely take any damage themselves, armed as they all are with lightning quick reflexes, super(man)-strength and Mortal Kombat fighting skills. Even the film’s (in my opinion unnecessary) American-centric narrative perspective seemed to just emphasize how incongruous the whole story was.
Visually, the film is stunning. It’s gorgeous in the fashion of 300 and Sin City. And Snyder wisely moves the camera away once in a while instead of forcing us to watch one brutal retribution scene after another. Atomic explosions, hand saws, broken fingers, and scalding hot oil are just some of the treats on the Watchmen menu, dished out by our supposed heroes. The characters are well-developed, to the point that film’s most violent, unforgiving hero Rorschach (played brilliantly by Jackie Earle Haley who gets the best lines to boot) becomes its only heartbeat.
I have heard from fans that Snyder managed a laudable adaptation of the Watchmen graphic novel by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons. Having not read it, I was able to watch Watchmen with fresh eyes. There is no question that the film is a deliberate, thoughtful story. But it is also completely soulless and vaguely threatening, and not even a little fun at that.
