Dec 10
JeremySociety and Culture day without a gay, gay marriage, gay rights, protest, volunteerism
Today, December 10, 2008, is being hailed by gay rights advocates as “Day Without a Gay.” Why? Because it rhymes and it’s kinda catchy. In all seriousness, today is also International Human Rights today and it’s being used as an opportunity to call attention to the anti-gay state initiatives that recently passed in California, Arizona, Arkansas, and Florida along with the continuing lack of recognition for gay rights in most states. It’s sort of like a sick out, but instead it’s a gay out. All over the country, gay men and women (along with every alternative label you can imagine) have called into work gay. Lest you think this is a freebie day off, those who participate in the protest are being asked to volunteer their time at gay-friendly (or at least neutral) non-profits which always need another hand or twelve. Basically, gay people are standing up and saying “You deprive me of basic human rights every day, so for just one day, I’m depriving you of my service.”
It sounds like a pretty cool idea in principle. In practice, I’m not sure how many men and women are actually doing it. I’m clearly not — I’m sitting at my desk doing both my regular day job and my writing job here. I, in fact, did consider taking part in the day. Then I realized that if all the gays and lesbians where I worked called out gay, the place would shut down for a day. Okay, not really, but pretty close and there might be some mission-critical elements that went undone for a day. Of course, maybe I work somewhere unusual: two out of seven senior executives are gay and another five or so department heads, let alone the individual faculty and staff. Then again, maybe working in such a gay-positive environment and living in a generally gay-friendly state makes me complacent and maybe that’s why I’m not participating. But I’m not sure that explains the fact that I don’t, offhand, know of anyone participating today.
Volunteer opportunities, along with general information, are listed at the website daywithoutagay.org. In all honesty, though, I was disheartened to see only three volunteer opportunities listed for Massachusetts. Heck, I’m sure there are more than three GLBT organizations in the state, let alone all the other groups that could use some help. A quick search shows that most states are in similar or worse shape, except maybe California. Really, I’m pretty surprised by that given that Day Without a Gay was not a left-field thing. I saw sporadic articles about it across the internet over the past month. If I found it without even paying attention, I can’t see how this protest opportunity could not have easily come to the attention of many more non-profits that could have posted themselves on the website and received some benefit today.
Maybe I should have done this. Maybe I should have called my boss this morning and said “I’m calling in gay. I’m going to deprive you of my services for a day and offer them for free to someone who really needs them.” But would it work? (I don’t think anyone even noticed that I was out sick yesterday.) I think passive resistance protest is too…well…passive for me. I’d rather go to a rally where the impact of thousands of people can be seen by sheer volume if nothing else than try to make quiet waves. I’m not disparaging the idea, but I don’t think it’s the right one for me.
Maybe this article is the way I turn it around and make it work for me. By showing up to work (and let’s face it, I haven’t been so prolific with the writing lately), I got you to read this article. That reminded you that there are people fighting for equal recognition under the law. Whether you meant to or not, I got you to spend a day with a gay. That’s how I’ve made my difference.
Dec 05
AndrewBusiness, Society and Culture admissions, applying for college, College
Question: Doesn’t it seem like everybody talks about getting into Harvard, Princeton, or one of the other so-called “elite” universities?
Answer: Wait, you don’t?
A school should rarely be judged by its ranking. Sure Princeton University offers an unparalleled educational opportunity, but its status as an elite and venerable institution at the top of the college rankings, along with other Ivy League schools like Harvard and Yale (which make up No. 1, 2, and 3 respectively) 1, is as much about its long history, its academic strength, and a carefully crafted marketing plan.
No one should question the caliber of education at such institutions. National universities can offer a wonderful college experience and a superior education but so can many state colleges, small liberal arts schools, community colleges and colleges abroad. National recognition on its own doesn’t make a school’s reputation. Rankings are as much about the hype as they are about assessing the strengths and weaknesses of the college.
College rankings can only tell you so much. U.S. News & World Report rankings for example, set forth at the premier college ranking in the United States, are derived from a mathematical formula. The college submits a data set which is plugged into the formula by U.S. News which ranks the colleges in order from best to worst (or worse yet: unranked.) The problem with relying on rankings to make your college selection: U.S. News decides what’s important in your college education.
The great myth of college rankings is that we all want to get into the elite colleges. It is a perception that is wholeheartedly encouraged by the schools themselves, and it is a perception that drives the rankings system even as other schools, which can provide a similar quality education, lose out because they don’t rank as high. If name recognition is important to you, and be honest, for some, the name of the school is its academic reputation, then you don’t need the college rankings to tell which are the best colleges. And for the rest of us, the rankings take away the most important part of selecting a college, deciding what’s important in picking a college.
To U.S. News credit, they suggest using their rankings as only one tool. But their marketing suggests that this a feint. They want you to believe wholeheartedly in the ranking system and go to great lengths to convince you their methodology is flawless. And if you buy into the rankings, you must also accept that the highest ranked schools provide the best education. The fact is, though, that rankings are influenced by the national recognition of colleges. There are plenty of schools you may not have heard of where you can get a quality education.
While colleges rankings can be used as one tool, the trick is to not make your entire decision about college based on what the rankings tell you is important. Make your own list. Make sure you consult other sources of information. Check out the college’s website. Take a visit to campus during the semester and talk to current students. Not only will you be able to see what the campus is like, but you will have a better idea of whether it fits you. Then you can read the rankings and see if being at the top really matters.
1 U.S. News & World Report, National Universities ranking, 2008 Edition
Dec 01
SquidSociety and Culture
Question: How was your Thanksgiving?
Answer: The first few minutes of Thanksgiving Day found me at a bar in downtown New Haven. More specifically, in the bathroom, holding my high school best friend’s hair while she rid herself of many a pint of Magner’s and a few red-headed sluts. I emerged from the bathroom with freshly washed hands and, after having done my friendly duty, I was ready for another pint. To my surprise, I had missed last call (at 12:40am). Bars apparently close at 1am on weekdays in New Haven, and cabs cannot be hailed, but must be called… and there is an hour wait. (I had had my father drop me off at the bar, because after having gone this long without a DUI, why get one now?) After a ride home from a stranger because I was not about to stand on a New Haven street corner for an hour, a late night visit to an ex-boyfriend, and three hours of sleep, I met my mother in her kitchen at 8am with a vicious hangover to peel some potatoes and polish some silver.
My parents hosted Thanksgiving dinner. To my mother’s chagrin, my uncle, a formerly bankrupt recovering alcoholic and cokehead, brought his ex-fiancé (now downgraded to girlfriend), whom we haven’t seen in about a year, to dinner. My mother made a delicious and beautiful meal and my father had generously bought a few bottles of my favorite Albariño. After dinner my uncle’s girlfriend decided to ask about my latest not-so-recent breakup, which is still a very sore subject. Now, I’ve never particularly enjoyed this woman- she’s kind of trashy, she’s kind of a bitch, and, while she and my uncle were broken up, all he spoke of her was what an easy lay she was- which is now the only mental picture I have of her. I simply told her that C and I had broken up, and left it at that. After her digging and prodding as to why, and after I’d downed another glass of wine, I said “Yep. He was an asshole. He was a suicidal drug addict who was abusive yet took me to court. Are we finished?” Girlfriend fell silent, and I took that as my cue to turn my Banana Republic wearing back on her Kmart-ladies-department-flyer-inspired self.
Friday night might have been my high school reunion… perhaps I didn’t get the memo? I had come down with a severe case of cabin fever after having spent 36 hours in a house with my parents, whose conversations all revolved around how they disagree with my political views, how I should be contributing more to my retirement fund, how I should be spending more time at the gym and less time drinking, and why they think I don’t have a boyfriend. I called a few friends (http://www.thebadapplesarebitter.com) who were meeting up at a margarita bar a town away, made my way through the holiday DUI checkpoint, and walked into the EHHS classes of ’98-’04 reunion. I spotted a few guys who had gotten to know me pretty well in the backs of cars, a couple of girls who I’d had bitch fights with at the age of 17, and an ex-boyfriend’s “bro” who later intentionally bumped into me so hard that I spilled half of my Long Island Iced Tea on the floor. It was great catching up with my actual friends, though, since I only get to see them a few times a year, and it was a nice surprise to run into and catch up with a middle/high school friend whom I adore but had lost touch with.
I was pretty ready to head home this morning- after ridiculous amounts of food, booze, and little sleep, I felt like crap and wanted to be in my own apartment. I packed my bags, pulled on some leggings, a hoodie, and my pink wellies, and headed out into the snow for the ride to Boston. En route, I stopped for some coffee at our neighborhood Dunkin Donuts, and standing in line was my high school boyfriend- a gorgeous hockey player who, at the time, drove a Camaro, had big muscles, sparkling teeth, and amazing dimples. As I am no longer the 110lb blond cheerleader I used to be, and because I would not let our first run-in in 7 years have me in leggings and a hoodie, I made sure to stay out of his line of vision.
God apologized for some of the not so fabulous events of the weekend by somehow clearing all traffic on I-91, I-84 and the Mass Pike this morning, by calling away all state troopers, and by letting the weather hold up, allowing me to drive between 65 and 85 in the left lane for 150 miles and get home in about two hours, despite the reports of heavy traffic today. All in all, it was a great weekend- I love my parents and adore my friends, and while this weekend was a bit tiring and a tad aggravating- I can’t wait to do it all again in a few weeks when Christmas comes.
Nov 30
JeremySociety and Culture Thanksgiving
Question: How was your Thanksgiving?
Answer: Dude, my Thanksgiving rocked. I travelled a few thousand miles to spend it with my sister, brother-in-law and absolutely amazing little niece. I got to cook Thanksgiving dinner, which in my world is the awesomest thing that could’ve happened that day.
Really, I had a week to remind me how much I actually have to be thankful for. I’ve spent an entire week’s time away from work. I haven’t even checked my work email ONCE since Saturday the 22nd. I’m seriously thankful for that.
I’m thankful that I was able to spend a few days with a little girl who means the world to me, who is growing up so very, very fast. I saw her three scant months ago, but already she’s big enough to be running around on her own and gibbering away, both in English and what appears to be her own language. Seeing her means that maybe Uncle Jeremy won’t be such a stranger the next time around. Seeing her also means seeing her parents, which is not something I get to do often enough. I’m thankful that their schedules worked out so well for me to be able to spend time with them all, despite there being workdays in the week.
I’m thankful for seeing a friend I see altogether too infrequently who happened to move to the same city where my sister lives. I’m glad we got to spend a day together and check out some cool art museum exhibits. I’m thankful for the really tasty cocktail that I got as we chatted during happy hour. I’m not entirely sure I’m thankful for the sweet potato spring roll, but we live and learn. Seeing a friend reminds me just how much we don’t get from instant messenger and facebook.
I’m thankful for a cheap upgrade to first class, too. On my way home, I was supposed to be spending two three and a half hour flights crammed between two other people at the back of the plane. Instead, I spent it in luxury at the front of the plane for just a few extra dollars, with a flight attendant who kept refilling the one drink I ordered to the point where I was completely hammered. That made the time pass quickly.
Yeah, my Thanksgiving reminded me that I have a lot to be thankful for. I’m also thankful that I didn’t go shopping this weekend.
Nov 30
JonathanSociety and Culture Holiday
Question: How was your Thanksgiving?
Answer: I am thankful for Thanksgiving. I love this time of year, getting a few days off, and having a built-in excuse to stuff my face. I’m also thankful after Thanksgiving. So, here on Saturday, I offer an optimistic speech not worth giving on Thursday afternoon…
I am thankful that my wife and I have our one year old son in our life. I am thankful that we are healthy enough to care for him and are fortunate enough to be able to provide for him. I am thankful for growth and change and learning. I am thankful for new perspectives. I am thankful for a home that is a place of warm, relaxed energy. I am thankful for a low-key and gentle marriage. I am thankful for contrasts.
I am thankful that my other family members -- mother, father, brother, sister-in-law, and their three daughters -- are nearby and healthy. I am thankful to get to see them for a few hours, a few times each year. I am thankful that our toddler son is rarely exposed to difficult children or adults that boss him around. I am thankful that my wife and I don’t have eating habits or traditions that cause stress for family gatherings. I am thankful that I have learned to be more giving and considerate of others, far more than I used to be, and willing to think of more than just my own needs. I am thankful for awareness over myopia, support over frustration, sharing over withholding, and -- most of all -- positivity over negativity.
I am thankful for the holidays and I am thankful for their brevity.
Nov 29
AndrewBusiness, Society and Culture Black Friday, Holiday
Question: Did you hear that a Wal-Mart employee got trampled by an out of control crowd of 2,000 looking for discounts on Black Friday?
Answer: Yeah, I read the AP news story. A Long Island Wal-Mart employee who was assigned to open the doors at 5 a.m. on Black Friday was then trampled by the ensuing mob of shoppers who apparently ran over him without a second thought. Other employees attempt to assist him were likewise knocked about. The police responded and shut the store down to protests by the shoppers who seemingly (at least given how the story was reported) were less than sympathetic that someone had just died.
The story wouldn’t be funny at all but it was a little snarky of the beat writer to include a list of items that were for sale in the Wal Mart. “Dozens of store employees trying to fight their way out to help Damour were also getting trampled by the crowd, Fleming said.
Items on sale at the store included…”
A human life isn’t worth a $9 The Incredible Hulk DVD.
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